Super Smash Bros Insanity
by Kojinka
Summary: UPDATE I made outtakes for this! R&R.
1. Default Chapter

AN: This is my first Smash Bros. fic, so go easy on me. Disclaimer: I own none of the characters on the SSB games. (yet) Though I do own a copy of both SSB and SSBM.

In Ganondorf's room, which looks a lot like the room GD plays the large organ in on Ocarina of Time, the smasher villains, Ganondorf and Bowser are duking it out. Ganondorf unleashes his aerial downward smash move on Bowser. (but not without unleashing something else) We hear what sounds like someone squeezing ketchup from an almost-empty bottle. "Geez man! Whadija eat!" Bowser holding his nose.

"Oops?" Ganondorf blushes. "Can't expect anyone to be able to hold it… GAAHH!" Ganondorf is cut short by Bowser's Koopa Klaw.

"Ha Ha! Take that, Twinkiebutt!" Bowser blew on his claws like a gun.

"Hey! I don't become that till The Wind Waker!" Ganondorf fumes. "When I find the person who made me look like that, I'm gonna give them a taste of my Warlock Punch!"

Capt. Falcon steps in. "I love punch! Gimme some pleeese?"

"_Argh!"_ A devilish grin appears on Ganondorf's face. "Okay, Falcon. You may have some." Ganondorf yells for a second-and-a-half, and we see Capt. Falcon flying out the room.

Ganondorf dusts his hands "That felt good!"

"Holy crap! Have we been practicing THAT long! We better crash in for the night." Bowser looking at a clock. "Gan, you okay?" Ganondorf is crouched down then he suddenly kicks Bowser high up with his upward smash move. "Jeeze! Save it for tomorrow when we kidnap Peach and Zelda!"

"I'm not tired!" Ganondorf whines like a 10 year-old Kokiri.

"Even villains need their rest!" _"Oh god! He's more human, yet I seem to be more reasonable!"_

"Oh, Fine!" 

Bowser and Ganondorf are now in their PJs: Bowser's is pretty much a night cap with mushrooms, and Ganondorf's is nothing but pink(!) boxers with little Triforce emblems.

GD hops on the top bunk "My bed! I call top bunk!"

The lights turn out, but one pair of eyes is still open.

"Can you tell me a story?" Ganondorf asks.

A second pair of eyes appears below.

"Go to sleep, Ganondorf!" retorts Bowser.

"UUUUURRRRRRRRP"

"GANONDORF!"

"BLLLLLLTTTTTTTT"

"BOWSER!"

"What?"

AN: Well? Like it so far? Sorry it's so short.


	2. Chapter 2

Next chappy coming up! (WARNING! CONTAINS BIG ZELDA GAME SPOILER!)

All characters of Super Smash Bros. belong to Nintendo

(next day, 9 AM)

Bowser was the first of the villains to wake up. He climbs to the top bunk where Ganondorf is sprawled all over, and nudges the Gerudo's shoulder. "G Man…" …Ganondorf only tossed with a grunt, and resumed to his obnoxiously loud snoring. "Wake up Lard-for-Brains!"

GD's eyes shot open "GET OUTA MY FACE!" and plopped his head back onto his star and crescent moon (Gerudo symbol on Ocarina of Time (N64)) pattern pillow.

"Excuuuuuuuuse me!" Bowser was definitely not prepared for that sudden outburst. He dropped off the ladder, causing the floor to shake from his weight.

(2 hours later)

Bowser is playing _Legend of Zelda: The WindWaker. _(Don't ask me how Bowser can play video games with those humongous(sp?) claws.) He is on the final battle.

"Morning Bowser!" Ganondorf jeers in hopping down from the top bunk.

"You're finally awake." Bowser has just placed the Master Sword into the tubby, emperor Ganondorf's skull.

Ganondorf looks at Bowser threateningly. "What are you doing?"

"What? I think it's rather amusing seeing a fellow villain be defeated on their games."

"Turn that thing off, or I will play one of the Mario games when you're around!" Ganondorf clenched his teeth.

"Doesn't bother me enough for that to work!"

"Why, you insolent fire-breathing TURTLE!" Ganondorf yelled, and shot a beam from his pointer finger leaving a big hole in the TV screen. "Goddesses Dang it! Look what you made me do! Now I gotta steal another TV!" (AN: Ganondorf doesn't have such an attack on SSBM, but that doesn't mean he can't do it. Evil Grin)

"Calm yourself, Ganondorf. Let's get somthin to eat."

"Okay! "

Bowser and Ganondorf (still in those dumb PJs O.O) go down to the Smashers' kitchen, where only two other smashers remain at the table, Link and Zelda. (they too are still in PJs)

"Link," says Zelda, "if we want this to work, you can't trash up the dorm, and expect ME to clean it! Please? It's not like I'm asking you to take your hat off in the dorm.

"Okay Zelda," Link replies. "Just so I don't have to spend another day with my younger self!" He notices Bowser and Ganondorf are in the room. "Oh sh(bleep)!"

Zelda slaps Link "Link! Watch your language!

"Well excuuuuuuse me, Princess!" retorted Link, rubbing his cheek.

Zelda slaps him again "And stop saying that goddesses-awful catch phrase!"

"Is this something personal, Mr. Ladies' Underwear?" Ganondorf grins evilly at Link, crossing his bare arms.

Link stands up fuming. He's wearing a white pair of bikini panties. "Look who's talking, Pink Boxers!"

Link and Ganondorf are about to face each other off, but are restrained by Zelda, who has Link, and Bowser, holding Ganondorf.

"Enough of this!" Zelda scolded. "You're both acting like children!"

"He started it!" Link pouted.

"C'mon, Link," said Zelda. "Let's get your underwear washed," she then whispered venomously into Link's ear, "so I can have my own panties back!"

Link shrugs, and follows Zelda out the room. Roy looks stupefied.

"Well," smirked Roy, "that's one side of Link I've never seen."

"Get away from me," Ganondorf snarls, and leaves the room to get dressed.

Roy and Bowser (silent wasn't he?) exit to do their own business.

"Mama Mia!" Mario said upon entering the messy kitchen. "What-a happened here?"


	3. Bathroom Humor

This is just an extra chapter filled with random insanity to make up for my laziness and huge writers' block; this fun extra is based upon one infamous room of the Smash Mansion.

Extra Chapter

Young Link and Ness are waiting in front of a door. Young Link is jumping up and down, and Ness is pinching his legs together. "Come on! Get out of the shower! Some of us really have to go here!" Ness whined.

"AAAIIIIEEEEEE! I can't hold it much longer!" cried Young Link.

The door finally opens and Donkey Kong struts out wearing a towel. "Ouuuwwrrr grouwrrr rownowooeeah." (translation: Everything is clogged in there.)

"Eeeeeeww!" Ness and Young Link said simultaneously.

"I think I'll just do my business outside like a dog," Young Link said.

"Me too," Ness added.

"Chu chu pi pi!" (translation: I gotta pee!) You guessed it, the little, electric Pokemon, Pikachu, rushes into the bathroom. The bathroom is filled with thick brown hair from D.K.'s turn. "PIKA PIKA?" (translation: WHAT THE!) an anime sweat drop formed on Pikachu's head. "Pi Pika… PIKACHUUUU!" The poor pokemon couldn't hold it any longer, so it jumped out the window to pee on the lawn.

Outside

"Aaagghh! What the crap?" Pika pee lands on Young Link's head.

Inside

Peach walks by humming. "Hmm hm hmmmm… huh?" Peach squeaked seeing the messy bathroom. "What a mess! I better clean this up! " Peach goes from spot to spot in a blur, humming and cleaning and unclogging like a super maid. "All done! "

"Hi-a Peach!" Luigi passes Peach and enters the Bathroom carrying a newspaper.

BBBBLLLLLLTTTTTT

A nasty smell engulfs the entire level of the mansion that the bathroom is located on.

"Holy crap! Who let THAT one out?"

"If you have-a to know, Marth, it was-a me!"

"Luigi you hog! Evacuate everyone on this level."

(Midnight)

"I like big butts, and I cannot lie!

You other bros can't deny!"

Someone in the shower was singing badly out of tune.

"Yoshi Yoshi Yoshi!" Yawns (obviously) Yoshi. (translation: Man! I really gotta stop drinking so many fluids before going to bed!) (knocks) "YOSHI! Yoshi!" (translation: SHUT UP, and give me a turn!)

The door flings open, squishing Yoshi in between. Out steps Ganondorf wearing a towel around his waist. Yoshi pops out from between the door and wall, grumbling a curse at GD. He steps in and slams the door.

Jigglypuff's voice is heard outside the bathroom "PUFF! Jiggly Jiggly!" (translation: Keep it down! Some of us is tryin' to sleep!)

Srry this is so short. I'll try my very best to clear up my writers' block. Until then, be patient with me.

The concept of GD singing the song about big butts in the shower midnight is my cousin's idea.


	4. Supper and Anime: Isa there a doctor?

The long awaited third chapter!

Link and his younger self are in their dorm fighting over their mystical instrument.

"My Ocarina!" Link pulls the blue Ocarina of Time to himself.

"My Ocarina!" Young Link pulls said Ocarina to himself.

This continues for a little bit until Young Link retorts, "How would you know? They look exactly the same!"

"I'm seven years older!"

"But you were asleep that whole time!"

Zelda walks in smiling, "Linky-poo! I cleaned your ocarina!"

Link grabs the ocarina fought over while his younger self's grip was lightened. "It's his," he pointed at Young Link.

"Whatever," Zelda sighed.

"Smashers!" Peach chimed, "Supper!"

"OH BOY!" shouted both Links stampeding Zelda.

"O.O This is no way for a princess to be treated." Zelda murmured.

25 places are set on the Smashers' large dining room table (Samus eats by herself. After an incident with that Halo guy, Master Chief, she doesn't want to be seen without her helmet. Poor girl.)

"Hey!" snapped Fox. "How's come dose two yellow rats get ta sit at da table wit us?"

"They're fellow Smashers, not pets!" replied Mewtwo. "And if you don't treat them equally, I'll give you something to whine about!" a purple aura flowed through the psychic pokemon's left paw.

"Now that's enough!" snapped Peach. "Tonight, Master Hand and I prepared… fried cucco, spaghetti and meat balls, assorted vegetables, apples, and an extra large stuffed crust pizza!" All of the food appeared on the table as if from nowhere.

"Wow! You two really out-did yourselves this time," complimented Falco.

"This time, Kirby, save some for the rest of us!" threatened Marth.

Kirby jeered innocently in his star warrior tongue.

"Mario, queet-a hogging-a the pepperoni!" barked Luigi.

"Mine!" the shorter plumber hissed.

"Keep the sibling rivalry away from the table, you two!" snapped Zelda.

"Well excuse-a us, Princess!" the Mario Bros. chimed simultaneously.

"AAAARRGGHH!" Zelda raged out of the dining room.

"That's my phrase!" Link pointed a bitten cucco leg at the plumbers. "Zelda, Zelda!" Link rushed after the Hyrulean Princess.

Ganondorf and Bowser laugh in glee giving each other a high-five. The rest of the Smashers glare at the villains.

"Why do such tings always happen during suppa?" wondered Fox.

"Pi! Pichu, Pichu, Pichu!" cried Pikachu's baby form.

"Saturday prime time Anime?" the Smashers jeered, stampeding into the home entertainment center.

"I guess we're having dessert in the living room. Cake and ice cream!" chimed Peach, leaving the kitchen with the dessert.

Master Hand enters the messy kitchen. "Groan! I hate Saturdays! Crazy Hand, help me out here!"

A twitchy giant left hand enters. "Yes, Master," Crazy Hand speaks in an Igor voice. "What may I do for you?"

"Help clean this mess up!" Master Hand commands in a Dracula accent.

The hands are picking up the dishes until the twitchy Crazy Hand drops many, breaking them. "Oops?" Crazy Hand blushed invisibly.

"Argh! Forget about it! Crazy Hand, I'll do it myself!"

"Sorry."

"LEAVE!"

8 pm

"Hey, Mario," said Samus. "You okay? You're looking a little green."

"Everything would-a look-a green from-a underneath-a that helmet, Samus," replied Luigi.

"It's a figure of speech, you dim wad!" snapped Samus.

"Umm… Okay," said Luigi with an anime sweat drop. "Wait! She's-a right," he added upon examining his brother. "You don't-a look-a all that-a good."

"I'm-a fine," retorted Mario as he stood up. "Ugh! Mama-Mia!" he sat back down. "Okie-dokie. Maybe I'm-a not-a feeling so hot."

"Well you've been a doctor before," said Peach, "do you know what's going on?"

"I am-a the doctor here," said Dr. Mario.

"I'm-a sure it's-a just a belly ache from-a those pizzas," said Luigi.

"He might-a be right. Just-a get-a some-a rest, and-a drink-a some-a 7-up."

"Come on, Mario, I'll get you up to your dorm," said Peach.

"No, Princess," objected Luigi. "I'll-a take 'im up. I'd like to-a rub it in."

"And Bowser and I will help," offered Ganondorf.

"What?" Bowser whispered.

"Play along, Bowser," hissed Ganondorf. "I have a plan."

a couple minutes later

Ganondorf and Bowser return to the TV room.

"Where's Luigi?" asked Peach.

"He's staying upstairs looking after Mario," replied Ganondorf.

"Beep beep beep buzz?" asked Mr. Game&Watch. (translation: But it's just a belly ache, right?)

"Yes," replied Bowser, "But you know how siblings are. They like rubbing it in."

"I guess you're right," said Popo (the blue Ice Climber)

9pm

"Look at the clock!" exclaimed Peach. "I think it's about time two young boys to be off to bed," referring to Young Link and Ness.

"What? No!" cried Ness.

"We wanna watch Anime!" pleaded Young Link.

"Kids, don't make us have ta send Samus!" said Fox.

"I hate it when they use me as a threat!" groaned Samus.

"AAGGHH!" Ness and Young Link rush upstairs.

"What?" retorted Samus, "I'm not that intimidating."

Most of this chapter was brainstormed during a nightly plushie play. Much better than the chapter idea with Link, Zelda, Peach, and Mario playing Ping Pong. game footage of the classic Pong


	5. More Anime Madness

Sorry for the long wait. School keeps me very busy. Here's chapter 4 of Super Smash Bros. Insanity!

Entertainment room, 10 pm

"I'm gonna check on the boys and go to bed," yawned Peach,

"But _Inuyasha _is gonna be on next," Marth smirked. "And I thought you had a crush on him."

"What? No!" Peach replied, blushing violently. "I need to check on Mario."

"Jiggly! Jigglypuff?" asked Jigglypuff. (translation: May sing you to sleep, Princess?)

"I'd love that Jigglypuff," said Peach.

Jigglypuff and Peach go upstairs.

"Inuyasha?" Nana jumped around with anime hearts in her eyes.

"Someone restrain her!" Popo cried.

Mewtwo grabbed onto the pink bouncing Ice Climber with his Psychic holding move. "If you're going to watch this with us, you have to control yourself, Nana," the psychic pokemon growled.

10:10

Jigglypuff has returned, and Ganondorf stood up stretching with Bowser following his lead. "We're going to bed too."

"Pi, pi. Pichu, Pichu!" Pichu chimed. (translation: Kay, guys. Good night!)

"Jiggly! Jigglypuff?" Jigglypuff asked the same question.

"Eh-no," stammered Ganondorf. "Bowser and I are, uh, so tuckered out, that I don't think that will be, uh, necessary."

"Good night," Bowser added before leaving with Ganondorf.

"Hmm…" Mewtwo thought to himself. "Something's going on with those two, and it doesn't seem good."

"Puff," Jigglypuff sighed in disappointment.

"Pika. Pika, pikachu," the electric mouse laid a hand on its pink friend's shoulder. (translation: It's okay, Jigglypuff. You can sing me to sleep.)

"Puff?" Jigglypuff smiled, took out its microphone, and took a deep breath.

"PIIKAA!" an anime sweat drop Pikachu shouted. (translation: Not now!) But before Pikachu could stop Jigglypuff, the soothing notes flowed like a peaceful stream from the pink puffball's vocal cords. The smashers' eyelids grew heavy till they could keep them open no longer.

"Puff?" Jigglypuff wondered when it heard a variety of snores emitting from the smashers. The ticked off ball inflated its round form. "PUUUFF! JIGGLY JIGGLY!" (translation: That was only supposed to be for Pikachu!) It popped the top of its microphone, which also happened to be a marker, and scribbled on the faces of all the smashers. (This is the same Jigglypuff from the anime that followed Ash and the gang for a while.) "Puff puff, PUFF!" (translation: We watch anime, NOW!)

Jigglypuff waited an hour for the smashers to wake up, but not a single eye fluttered open. The balloon pokemon decided to float to its dorm to get some shuteye.

In Mewtwo's subconscious,

"Hmm," the psychic pokemon thought, "something unusually funny is going on in the Smash Mansion tonight. I sense a few souls still awake. This will be investigated tomorrow morning, and… what is that smell?"

Strange, I expected this to be longer. Oh, well, I promise you the next chapter will be longer and have more action.

Out of hyperness, and to make up for the shortness of this chapter.

Somewhere in Subcon,

Wart: Paraslave, where's my pizza?

Paraslave enters.

Paraslave: Here you go, Master.

Wart: Ah, sweet food. takes bite and chokes Gah! Did you put vegetables in this? You KNOW I'm allergic to vegetables! dies

Paraslave: BWAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA! I'm my own boss now! Cheers to a new life. takes bite of Wart's pizza and chokes Oh, crap! –cough- Apparently that stuff is bad for me too. dies


	6. The Rescue

And now, chapter 5 of Super Smash Bros. Insanity!

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

"AAAAGGGHHHH!" the non-pokemon smashers who fell asleep from Jigglypuff's singing the night before shrieked. Pikachu and Pichu merely rolled their eyes, and Mewtwo teleported out of the room.

"Oh, please don't let this stuff be permanent!" Samus cried.

"Pika Pikachu," Pikachu reassured Samus. (translation: I don't think it is.)

Mewtwo, after cleaning his face off, wandered in the on the upper floor. "I also haven't seen the Triforce bearers at all this morning." Mewtwo stopped in front of the door leading to Zelda's room and used his x-ray vision to see through the door. He gasped at what he saw. He tried to open the door, but it was locked.

"Morning, Mewtwo," Young Link greeted. "What are you doing in front of Princess Zelda's room?" Mewtwo grabbed the young Hylian's arm. "Gah! What are ya doing?" Mewtwo teleported them into the princess's room, where an almost naked Link was bound and gagged by the bed. "Oh, my goddesses! What happened?" gasped Young Link, staring at his struggling older self.

"I assume this is the doing of Ganondorf and Bowser," the psychic Pokemon ripped the tape off the hero's mouth.

"AAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHH!" the Hylian screamed in pain. "Argh!" he groaned after recovering. "You couldn't be more correct. Zelda! Where's Zelda? Is she okay?"

"The princess is not in here," said Mewtwo. "She has most likely been kidnapped again."

Link exasperated a sigh as his younger self worked his Kokiri Sword to cut the ropes bounding the Hylian teen.

Freed from his predicament, Link stretched his arms and legs. "Let's go save us a princess!"

"Not like that, you're not!" snapped Mewtwo, referring to Link's attire, which was nothing but underwear.

"Oh," Link blushed. The Hylian donned his hat and tunic. "Okay," said a now fully dressed Link with his sword and shield at ready. "Let's go!" He unlocked the door, and he, his younger self, and the psychic pokemon exited the princess's room.

"What were you doing in Zelda's bedroom in the first place?" asked Mewtwo.

"I was trying to comfort her from last night's supper outburst," said Link.

Mewtwo sniffed the air. "The stench I smelled last night appears to have been coming from the room of the Mario bros," he thought to himself. "Hold on, Hylians," the legendary pokemon stopped in front of the bros.' room and used his x-ray vision again. He grabbed the Hylians' arms and teleported into the bros.' room.

Mario and Luigi, like Link, were asleep at the foot of their bunk bed bound and gagged, but unlike Link, they were still in their overalls. The area of the mushroom patterned carpet in front of Mario was covered with dried pizza chunks.

"Eew! Italian vomit!" Link cringed after unlocking the door.

The plumbers' eyes lifted open, and Mario muffled something no one could understand.

Link carefully stepped around the plumber puke to un-gag the brothers and cut the ropes with his Master Sword.

"What's-a going on?" the younger brother demanded.

"And where's-a Bowser and-a Ganondorf?" Mario added.

"I believe the villains have, once again, kidnapped Peach and Zelda," said Mewtwo. "They were pretty thorough this time. They locked the doors of this room and Zelda's room, where Link was also bound and gagged."

"What!" cried Mario. "I'm-a coming, Peach!" the red brother rushed toward Bowser's room.

"Should we follow him?" Young Link asked Mewtwo.

"The doors to Bower's and Ganondorf's rooms will most likely be locked, so yes," said Mewtwo.

Mewtwo, both Links, and Luigi chased after the portly Italian. Upon reaching Bowser's room, Mewtwo used his x-ray vision. "Interesting," the purple pokemon mused. "Zelda's tied up in there, not Peach."

"Must be a new strategy to confuse the princesses," Young Link guessed.

"Okay, Mario," said Link. "You and Luigi kick Bowser's butt, while my younger self and I free Zelda. Mewtwo, you know what to do."

"I sure do," said Mewtwo. He then said in his private thoughts with a dark smile, "Teleport them into the rooms then use my x-ray vision on the princesses, heh, heh, heh!"

The Links and the brothers touched Mewtwo, and the psychic Pokemon teleported the heroes into Bowser's room. The Link's rushed to Zelda, and the Italians rushed to face their reptilian foe.

"Well, well, well, pesky plumbers," Bowser growled. "This is a pleasant surprise. I never expected one like Mewtwo to assist you and the Hylians!"

"I only assist when my skills are needed," Mewtwo said before leaving to check Ganondorf's room.

"Well?" Bowser snorted a puff of smoke from his nostrils.

"Bring it on," Mario smirked.

A ring of fire surrounded Bowser and the brothers, and they began to fight.

Meanwhile, Link has untied the bandana covering Zelda's mouth while his younger self worked on the ropes. "Link!" the princess sighed in relief. "And Young Link," she giggled. "I'm still not used to that."

"You okay, Zel?" Link asked.

"I am now, Link," the ropes keeping Zelda tied up were finally cut, and she hugged the Hero of Time and pecked him on the cheek. Link blushed violently, and curled a Charlie Brown smile on his face.

"Hey! What about me?" Young Link asked. "I helped too!"

"I'd never forget about you, Young Link," Zelda pecked a kiss on the young Hylian's forehead. Young Link too blushed violently and curled a Charlie Brown smile.

The flames surrounding the Mario characters vanished with the brothers standing triumphantly over Bowser's unconscious form. "He'll-a be fine," said Mario while he and his brother walked to the Hylians.

"Well," Link said to his younger self after picking up the key to Zelda's room, "ready to give Ganondorf a good ole Linkwhopin' (1)?"

"You bet!"

Zelda and the heroes left for Ganondorf's room. They met Mewtwo in front of the door. "Peach is in there, and Ganondorf is still asleep," the psychic pokemon said. "I have unlocked the door for you. Good luck, heroes." With that, Mewtwo teleported to attend to his own business.

"Here, Zel," Link handed Zelda her room key.

"Thanks again, Link. Give Ganondorf a good whack in the head for me," the Hyrulean princess left to tend to her duties.

"This is it," Link thought as he turned the knob on Ganondorf's door. Ganondorf was sprawled on his top bunk at one corner (what a lazy pig!), and in another corner, Princess Peach was in a cage struggling in the ropes bounding her, muffling screams from a cloth covering her mouth.

"Let's give ole Ganny a rude awakening!" said Young Link while Mario and Luigi searched for the key to Peach's cage.

The Links climbed to the top bunk. "Get up, pig-for-brains!" Link said.

"We got a bone to pick with you!" Young Link added.

"Ugh! I don't wata go to school today, Twidrova," the Gerudo sniffled a groan.

"No, silly," Young Link lightly kicked Ganondorf's leg.

"Wha-what?" the Evil King shook awake. "Well, Links!" he said in a raspy tone. "Seebs I hab uderestibated both ob you!"

"You feeling alright?" Link wondered.

"Deber felt—bleapeah!" the bloodshot Gerudo sneezed a shiny object out of his nose.

"Eeeeeewww!" Luigi cried.

"Ick!" Mario agreed. "Well it's-a better than-a storing it up his-a butt."

"Mario, you're making-a me woozy!

"Well," said Link, "I guess this is for Zelda," he whacked Ganondorf unconscious in the head with the hilt of the Master Sword.

Mario reluctantly picked up the snot-covered key. "Yuck! I'm-a gonna have to put-a my gloves in-a the wash after this."

"Here, guys!" Young Link tossed his sword to the brothers. "You can use that to cut the ropes."

"Thanks, Young Link," Luigi said picking up the Kokiri Sword.

"Mario! Luigi!" Peach cried when the red-clad plumber untied her bandana. "I knew you two would come rescue me. But why did Ganondorf kidnap me?"

"It-a wasn't just-a Ganondorf," said Mario, while Luigi worked on the ropes with Young Link's sword. "It was-a Bowser's doing as-a well."

"We kicked-a Bowser's butt in-a his room, where Zelda was-a held-a hostage," Luigi added.

"Thank you, so much," Peach graciously hugged both brothers when the ropes were finally cut loose.

While Luigi handed the Kokiri Sword back to Young Link, the Mushroom princess kissed the older brother on the cheek. Thus, the SMAS end sequence was revamped.

"Let's go downstairs," said Peach. The heroes and the princess left the room of the flu-stricken Ganondorf.

Ganondorf was nurtured back to health with his wife, Destiny, whom you've probably met in my other SSBM fanfic, at his bedside.

Peach caught Ganondorf's flu the next day, and Mario stayed by her bedside the whole time. He caught it, and Peach stayed by his side the whole time. How sweet!

Mewtwo continued to assist the smasher heroes, but only if he felt his psychic powers were needed.

Young Link continued on in his childhood days.

Link and Zelda simply lived happily ever after.

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

I can't believe it's actually done. (sniff) This is the first multi-chapter fanfic I've ever completed typing. I thank all of you that read or R&R this story. I may consider writing a sequel.

(1) Linkwhopin': "the term for when Link completely owns someone or something." This term was started by Exploding Deku Nut's webmaster, Darth Citrus, in one of his A.S.S.A.s (A Somewhat Serious Article) on Zelda Blog.


	7. Bloopers

I said this story was completed, but I think I'll write a few bloopers for it, since I had so much fun writing it. (Blooper sprays author with ink) I meant 'bloopers' as in outtakes, not the Mario enemies! These are outtakes, so, yeah. This chapter may have to be in script.

Warning! Some bloopers contain material unsuitable for children. Reader discretion is advised.

(disclaimer: I do not own the smashers… yet)

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

(Chapter 1: Bowser has called Ganondorf 'Twinkiebutt')

Ganondorf: When I find the person who made me look like that, I'm gonna give them a taste of my Warlock Punch!

(waits for Captain Falcon to say his line, but he doesn't enter the room)

CF: (off stage) Hold on! Hold on! Ahhh! (toilet flush sounds) (CF finally enters)

Kojinka: Cut!

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

(Chapter 1: The villains are getting ready do go to bed)

Ganondorf: I call top!

(Bowser is climbed in underneath, but he notices that it is not SSBM Ganondorf that is hopping to the top bunk, but was actually Ganondorf from TWW)

Bowser: What? Wait! NO!

(It was too late. TWW Ganondorf landed his fat butt on the top bunk. The force of the landing and TWW GD's weight were so great that the bunk bed snapped. Bowser would've been flatten like a Koopa pancake had it not been for his shell)

SSBM Ganondorf: (walking in with an ice cream cone) What?

Kojinka: (sigh) That's it! No more stunt doubles!

Bowser: (struggled out of the bunk bed ruins) Thanks a lot, GanonD(scene retake beep)

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

(Chapter 2: next day, 9 am)

Bowser was… Bowser!

Bowser: zzzzzzzzz (snore)

Kojinka: Wake up, Lizard Butt!

(Bowser doesn't respond)

Kojinka: Great. Did Wario spike Bowser's non-alcoholic beverage again?

Wario: I wanted to be in-a the story, but I'm-a not a Smasher! (leaves)

Kojinka: Where are you going?

Wario: To Nintendo HQ in-a Kyoto, so I can-a get-a to the bottom of-a this-a glaring error! By the way, I enjoy your scene divider.

Kojinka: Get out of here before I turn those dividers upside down!

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

(Chapter 2: Ganondorf sees Bowser playing TWW)

Ganondorf: Why, you insolent fire-breathing TURTLE! (GD shoots beam from index finger, but misses target and hits Bowser)

Bowser: OW!

Kojinka: Cut!

(Take 5. Ganondorf says his line and shoots his beam, but how, hits an expensive Gerudo vase)

Ganondorf: FU(scene retake beep)

(Take 8. Ganondorf says his line again and shoots beam again, but the beam now hits the Gamecube)

Ganondorf: MY GAMECUBE! SON OF A— (Before he can finish his curse, Ganondorf collapses in to a sobbing pile, then gets a heart attack.)

Kojinka: Ohkaaayy. I guess we will resume tomorrow.

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

(Chapter 2: Zelda slapped Link for saying that phrase from the eighties Zelda cartoons)

Ganondorf: Is this something personal, Mr. Ladies' Underwear?

(Link stands up fuming, but instead of us seeing white bikini underwear, a black censor block was covering his waist.)

Kojinka: (entranced by Link's naked body, but shakes herself to concentrate on the issue) Cut! Link, where are Zelda's panties?

Link: They're in the laundry. (blushes) I got nervous and spilled grape juice on them.

Zelda: WHAT! (Zelda nabs Peach's frying pan and knocks Link unconscious)

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

(Extra chapter)

Peach: (humming) Whoa! (While Peach is cleaning D.K.'s bathroom mess like a super maid, she trips on the bath mat, and her face lands in her bucket of soapy water.) Ungh! Pft! Pft!

Kojinka: LMAO I love it, but cut!

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

(Extra chapter: After Luigi enters the bathroom)

BBBBLLLLLLLLLLTTTTTT

Marth is walking down the hall, and when he smells the Luigi crap, he faints. Luigi exits bathroom

Kojinka: (enters wearing a gas mask) Umm Luigi, whatever you had for lunch today, don't eat it tomorrow.

(Take 2: same time, next day.)

Luigi was about to enter the bathroom, but Pichu shoves him aside.

Pichu: Sorry, dude. Huge emergency. (slams door)

Kojinka and Luigi: O.O Uh, oh. AAAAGGGHH! (Kojinka and Luigi take cover)

An explosive 'BBBBLLLLLTTTTT' is heard throughout the Smash Mansion

Luigi: (cough) Mama Mia!

Kojinka: Better evacuate the mansion.

(Mario enters and turns the scene dividing 'W's upside down, then walks off screen innocently whistling the SMB overworld theme)

(Extra chapter: Midnight)

Ganondorf: Sooooomewheeeere ooover the raaainbow,

Kojinka: Cut! You're supposed to be singing the song about big butts!

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

(Extra chapter: a little bit after the Midnight scene)

Jigglypuff: Puff! (Jigglypuff grabs her microphone and sings)

Kojinka: (yawn) Not a bad idea—zzzzzzz (before Kojinka can finish her sentence, she falls asleep)

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

(Chapter 3: the smashers are eating their supper)

Luigi: Mario, quit-a hogging-a the pepperoni!

Mario: BUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRPPPP

Kojinka: ROFLMAO Oh, man! Why did I have to leave that out of the final version?

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

(Chapter 3: Master Hand enters dining room after the smashers left to watch anime)

Master Hand: (sigh) I hate Saturdays.

(Garfield enters)

Garfield: Saturdays are okay, but Mondays are much worse for me. Okay, Kojinka, I made an appearance! Where is my lasagna?

Kojinka: There is none. The Marios ate it all.

(disclaimer: I do not own Garfield)

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

(Chapter 3: Smashers are watching anime)

Samus: Hey, Mario, you okay? You look a little green.

Mario: Everything-a looks-a—blleeeaaaaaaaahhhhhh (Mario spewed pizza chunks all over the carpet)

Everyone: Eeeewwww!

Luigi: That's-a what you get-a for-a stealing my line!

Kojinka: Okay, Smashers, we'll shoot this scene next week. Pukesmith, salvage as much of that vomit as you can. We'll use it for a later chapter.

(The Pukesmith is a cousin for the Poopsmith I made up for this moment. The Poopsmith is from the Homestar Runner internet cartoons, which I do not own)

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

(Chapter 3: 9pm)

Peach: Look at the clock! I think it's about time for two young boys to be off to bed.

Ness: No!

Young Link: You'll never take us alive!

(Young Link and Ness brandish huge weapons)

Kojinka: Cut!

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

(Chapter 4)

Nana: Inuyasha? (Nana jumps around the room with anime hearts in her eyes till she crashes into the camera)

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

(Chapter 5: Mewtwo grabs Young Link in the hallway in front of Zelda's room)

YL: Hey! What are— (Instead of teleporting, Mewtwo accidentally ram YL and himself into the door)

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

(Chapter 5: Mewtwo rips the tape off Link in Princess Zelda's room)

Link: AAAAAAAAAAAARRRGGHHH! You (bleeping) (bleep) (bleep)! Why I oughta—

Kojinka: Whoa, Link! Watch the language! Cut!

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

(Chapter 5: the ropes are cut from Link)

Link: Let's-a go!

Kojinka: Cut!

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

(Chapter 5: Mewtwo and the Links teleport into the Bros.' room.)

Link: Eew! Italian vomit!

YL: (sniffs) Ugh! Who did that?

bound and gagged Mario: (muffling a claim)

Kojinka: Oh, god! Cut! Open some windows! Jeeze, Mario! Your farts smell worse than mine. And mine smell pretty bad. O.O

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

(Chapter 5: Mario rushes out of the room to rescue Peach)

Young Link: Should we follow him?

Link: (donkey face) Uh, duuuuuuuuuuuuuhhh!

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

(Chapter 5: Mewtwo uses his x-ray vision on Bowser's door)

Mewtwo: Sweeeeet hot tamale! (drools)

Mario: Hey! Are you using your x-ray vision to see through my girlfriend's clothes?

Mewtwo: No. (drools) Link's girlfriend.

Link: You pervert! (whacks Mewtwo with the hilt of the Master Sword)

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

(Chapter 5: Bowser and the Mario Brothers are about to fight)

Bowser: BWAHAHAHAHAHA—COUGH! COUGH! Oh—COUGH! Gawd! I'm—COUGH! Choking—COUGH! On my own—COUGH! Saliva!

Mario and Luigi: (ROFL)

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

(Chapter 5: Mewtwo uses x-ray vision to see through Ganondorf's door)

Mewtwo: Oh, gawd! Ganondorf's raping Peach!

Mario: WHAT? I'LL KILL THAT BASTARD! (Mario storms into Ganondorf's room leaving a comical Mario-shaped hole in the door)

Kojinka: Ganondorf? o.O

Mario: Wait a moment! (pokes head out of door) Ganondorf was doing none of the sort!

Mewtwo: Well it was a lot funnier than me teleporting you guys.

Mario: I'LL KILL YOU INSTEAD!

Mewtwo: Uh, oh!

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

(Chapter 5)

The key that Ganondorf sneezed out hits Mario on the face

Mario: Waaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh! Ganon snot! Get it off! Get it off!

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

Hmm. My funniest ideas seem to come when I drink lots of pop (soda for you southern readers). Hope you enjoyed these sugar high bloopers!


End file.
